God is just always blowing my mind. He is so incredible! Even in the simple things I'm amazed. He sometimes shows me hearts in the clouds; it even happened just last week when I got to school. And a couple weeks ago at a job interview I got to tell the guy interviewing me that I want to get into youth ministry, like a youth pastor of sorts, and he was just like "oh, so that's ur calling." The he asked if it runs in the family. So basically I got to talk about God in an interview, and i'm almost positive that the guy is a Christian :) Last week I got to spend a few hours with some of my Jesus family, and heard an amazing devo. Just being with them I could feel the love of Jesus. Then I got to go to a sleepover where we ended up praying and worshipping most of the night. I got to share the vast majority of my testimony, all the parts that I have only ever told a couple women that I really trust. It was just sooo freeing, and totally a God oriented thing. We went in the streets and worshipped. Later we hiked up to a cross and God's presence was just so there!! The littlest things, and the biggest things all make a difference. God makes the difference. I heard one song on my way home last weekend and all my thoughts were shook. I realized just how jealous God is for my affection. He literally showed me His love. (See my note "Eden" if u wanna know the deets about that.)
Yaweh has just SHOWERED me with His Love the last couple weeks. He shows up in the craziest places. His love knows no bounds <3 Jesus is my best friend, my lover. He is terribly jealous for my love, for my intimacy. He's reaching out, crying out to me all day long. I just need to grab hold of all that He is. He is near to me even when I am far from Him; I'm the only one who blocks anything in our relationship. He is always pursuing me, but sometimes I'm the one pushing Him away. I don't have perfect love to give, yet His perfect love is given to me. I can't even tell you how crazy perfect God is in every way and in every attribute He possesses. It is so incredible. I LOVE GOD!!!!! Everyone can know!!
When I need it most or expect it least, God is always pouring His love out on me. So I have a list of things that I desire in my future husband, and one of the things on my list is that he shows me he loves me in the most incredible and crazy ways; lately, I've realized that God is always doing that for me. You know, people are always saying that He is Lover, but not until I really looked at my life did I realize how real that fact is. I mean, one of the things I most want in a husband God has fulfilled in Himself. Psalm 37:4"Delight yourself also in the LORD,And He shall give you the desires of your heart." He knows my heart. He knows all of my innermost thoughts. And He chooses to give me what I want most!! That is just incredible. I mean,not only did He die on the cross in my place, which is a HUGE deal, but He also takes the time in my everyday life to say "I Love You." To me! Little, tiny me, on this little, tiny planet called earth. He has said that I deserve to be loved, and not just by anyone, but by the One Who is Love, the One Who loves perfectly. He chose me to be His bride. He chose me to be His first love. Not dogs, not birds, not venus fly traps, or even the ocean. He chose me, chose you, chose us, as totally imperfect humans, to be who He loves the most. GOD LOVES ME!!!!! <3<3<3
In case u can't see it, this is a pic of the first time God expressed His love for me thru showing me a heart in the clouds <3
